It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
Randomize
