talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
Randomize
