Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
So gin and wine won't be happening again
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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