i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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