Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
