hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
