So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Randomize
