I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
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