i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
