Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
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