Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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