Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
