last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Randomize
