It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
