youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Randomize
