Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
Randomize
