sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize
