her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
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