Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Randomize
