I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
