Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Randomize
