Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
