Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
