ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
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