ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
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