i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Randomize
