Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Randomize
