that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
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