you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Randomize
