Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
