Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Randomize
