Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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