Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
you're hired as official boob wrangler
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
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