Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I wish you could order shots online.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Randomize
