No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
Randomize
