Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
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