super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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