I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
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