Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
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