im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Randomize
