Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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