I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
My liver is preforming stress tests.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Randomize
