bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
me + whiskey = a bad person
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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