So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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