apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
My breasts were aching with rage.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
