You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
I am mentally ready for anal.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
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