the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
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