Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
