so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Randomize
