You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Randomize
